Hip.. Hip-hop... hip-hop anonymous???

I sense a change is in the air. The ability to comfortably wear shorts at night? A new Jack Johnson cd on repeat? Lake Powell trips? Hmmm.. sounds to me like SUMMER is finally here!

I won't bore you all the the semantics of our epic trip to Lake Powell, but here are some rapid-fire deets. 53 people, 1 houseboat. Mortars that may or may not have been set-off. Cops may or may not have been called ("whoever lit those off are jackasses!") Random hook-ups that allegedly happened. Drama involving a certain Mr. Adams and swooping (who woulda thought??!!) That pretty much describes what what on over the course of the weekend.

While at work the other day, Brandon and myself came up with a clothes acceptance system. Needless to say, people would be rated by body size and given a number that corresponds with what clothing they are allowed to wear. Call us shallow, but it just might work. Details coming next time.

Smile, like you've got nothing to prove

Summer school has officially started, which would be ok except for the fact that the weather decided that it is NOT summer yet! I'm going to St. George over Meorial Day weekend and I'm stoked for some actual shorts and golf weather. Not to mention going to the lake. Since most of the exciting things in my life involve people that I'd rather not give names to on this blog, here's a blog that tells stories similar to the ones I would tell: Mormon Bachelor Pad. You can thank me later.

devastated

Sooooooo the Jazz lost last night to our bitter rivals, the Lakers. Even though my boy D-Will completely posterized the insanity that is Ron Artest, we still lost because Boozah isn't "long" enough and couldn't get that last rebound. According to the woman announcer (during the Nuggets game), the Jazz aren't "long" enough, versatile enough, or even good enough to beat these Lakers. My response to that is that the woman announcer (who we'll call Cheryl for the purposes of this post) is a complete idiot. Now, I'm not sexist in the least, but I do believe there are a couple things women should not do on televsion. These include announcing Men's sporting events and speaking in General Conference. I mean, there's only so many times we can hear the same spiel... "You youth are just so wonderful! This rising generation has so much potential and I just love you all soooo much blah blah blah, Amen." As soon as Sister So-and-so stands up, that signals to me that its time to make some popcorn and hit the bathroom before Elder Holland gets up to spiritually punch us all in the face.


"I'm Julie B. Beck and I approve this message."

Big Fes

Who is my favorite Jazz player, you ask? D-Will? Booz-ah? NO! My favorite player on the Jazz is none other than Kyrylo Fesenko, the 7'1" 300 lbs. Ukranian. Big Fes, as I call him, has captured my heart during this years playoffs. Not only has he stepped in for my man Memo, but he has thrown down at least one back-breaking thunder DUNK every game and has now started to hit his free throws. It has become my mission in life to become friends with this gentle giant. From what I've been able to find out, the Fes Man lives at the Gateway and doesn't drive. This means that he takes the bus/Trax to get around. I have it on good authority that he frequents the Jimmy Johns on 4th South. Wouldn't being friends with Fes be freakin' tight?! I mean, think about it... clubbing with Fes, picking up chicks with Fes, even bowling with Fes. Any activity takes on a whole new meaning when you add in a giant Ukranian. If anyone has any tips on how we can become BFFFF's, let me know!


you can't contain this

The Double Down

The KFC Double Down was AMAZING! This marvel of fast food engineering contains no buns. Instead, 2 friend chicken filets are used with slices of bacon, cheese sauce, and real cheese placed in between. This meaty, cheesy, bacony concoction is a flavor blast to the taste buds and was well worth the $5.

Double Down, I salute you and give you TWO thumbs up.

Fat Kids Everywhere Rejoice!

Will I be back tomorrow with a review? You bet I will!

edit: the KFC I went to was SOLD OUT of Double Downs at the time... maybe tomorrow?

All-Stars

During my year at the BYU, Aaron and I came up with a saying to describe some of the guys we routinely saw at parties or in our wards that all seemed alike in their d-bagness. This phrase has caught on and now I hear it often when I happen to be in Provo. While they come in different variations, here are the qualifications of a "Provo All-Star."

1. Is from "The OC", northern Utah, or the East Coast.
2. Is 25 years old or older and STILL hasn't graduated.
3. Tends to be "taking the semester off"... right.
4. Lives at Belmont, Alpine Village, or Arlington.
5. Wouldn't be caught dead without his designer jeans (usually True Religion or Rock & Republic)
6. tight V-neck.... check.
7. is seen with the other All-Stars everywhere he goes (dance parties, Spoon Me, ward activities)
8. Generally dates freshman
9. Drives his daddy's BMW/Range Rover
10. lives and dies by doing summer sales

If someone you know has 2 or more of the characteristics, odds are that they also have the rest. It's uncanny.

For those of you from St. George, here is a list detailing the "St. George All-Stars"

1. are RM's and STILL going to Dixie
2. either don't have a job or work at Fabulous Freddys'
3. wouldn't be caught dead without their Affliction and Filter shirts (did they bedazzle their own shirts??)
4. hang out with high school girls
5. since they don't work, they go to the gym twice a day
6. constantly tan (from the tanning beds)
7. live at home
8. love their M.E.K. or Rock Revival jeans
9. talk CONSTANTLY about moving "up north" but will never do it
10. are generally worthless bums

I only made it halfway....

Super Trooper

Contrary to Popular Belief...

Contrary To Popular Belief,

Skinny jeans are NOT attractive (unless your legs are longer than normal)
Ugs have their name for a reason. They are Ugly. Only wear them if it’s raining or snowing.
Anthropologie is not attractive, don’t shop there.
The whole “indie” look should be done away with. Clothes go to D.I. for a reason.
Pigtails ARE hot.
Blowing a guy off for a date will NOT make him want you more. All it does is make you look classless and ungrateful.
Guys don’t play “the game”. If you think we are, it’s only because we are responding to the fact that you DO play it.

Guys:
Ed Hardy and Affliction is for douches, tools, and MMA fighters only (I mean really.. did you bedazzle it yourself??)
You are a man. Dress like a man. Skinny jeans aren’t for men.
You don’t have to shave your entire body.
Hipster scarves are exclusively for homosexuals and women. If you can’t check either box, stop wearing them.
Nike Dunks shouldn’t be worn outside of the basketball court.
If you spent more on your jeans than you do on your monthly car payment, you’ve got a problem.

Mustache March

Day 8 and all I can say is Be Prepared.

Finally!

Well, I'm finally through my mid-terms and just took the BlackJack Advertising business plan to the printers. $400 later and I'm the proud owner of 17 spiral-bound, full color copies to turn in to the competition. Wish us luck!

The Entrepreneurial Spirit

New blog alert! So I'm starting a new blog detailing my experiences in starting a new advertising company called BlackJack Advertising. I'll be making a post tomorrow detailing the process up til now and will continue making updates throughout the next few months as we finish the business plan competition we are in, get funding, and actually start producing. Hopefully this will be a fun read for those of you familiar with Smalls, Eric, and I.

Check it all out tomorrow!

Big Things

sooooo.... I've got a couple exciting/busy months ahead! In no particular order, here's the goods:
- LSAT and GMAT in June
- Finals for the Utah Entrepreneur Challenge (for BlackJack Advertising) next month
- Full-time PAID internship with Zions this summer (still not for sure, but it's looking good!)
- 15 credits this semester and 9 this summer so I can graduate next year

if anyone has any advice on the LSAT or GMAT, please send it my way!

Instant Classic

Last night included a moment for the ages. Brad, Aaron, Brandon, Nate, Kaden, and myself took a little trip to Midway for a 1920's themed party thrown by Karly and some of her friends. Upon arriving, we took a minute to look around for our good friend Matt Beck. Just as we were about to give up our search, we all see Beck coming down the stairs. Our friend Matt wasn't alone, however. He was followed closely by a certain female who just happened to be Aaron's little sister Melissa! As soon as we saw this hilarious sight we all started dying of laughter. I mean tears in our eyes, roaring laughter! Beck had the biggest grin on his face and Aaron looked like he wanted to die. Classic.

Stalker tendencies and a RANT

So I am currently sitting in my 7:30 am Financial Accounting class. I generally sit in the back so I can just listen and hopefully not get called on. It also gives me the best vantage point for one of my favorite activities - looking at other people's computer screens. It's always interesting to see what others are looking at, be at Facebook, Whiskey Militia, or espn.com.

I find it interesting how into other people's lives we have become. I used to think that I was different, but here I am with a blog, a Fbook, and (sometimes) a Twitter account. I mean, am I really that important that people care about what I'm doing at all times? The answer to that question is a resounding NO! Regardless, people do seem to care and I apparently enjoy the attention that it brings.

(rant warning)

What ever happened to a a good old fashioned phone call? Lately, I've been trying to bring back the phone call and my results have been mixed. Some girls that I call won't pick up but will immediately TEXT me back. What's up with that? If I call you, I would prefer a CALL back. Texting for hours on end gets so old and boring. What accomplish in 6 hours (constrained to 160 characters!)could just have easily been done over one 15 minute phone call, which happens to be much more personal. Or is being non-personal the point of it all? Do we say different things because of the non-personal natur of the text? IMO this is NOT a good thing.

That is all.

Free Music Friday!

In what I hope is the first of many, here are a couple cd's I've been loving lately and a link to each so that you may share in my love. Enjoy!

Jack’s Mannequin – The Glass Passenger

The Glass Passenger is the second album from the Jack’s Mannequin. Led by ex-Something Corporate singer Andrew McMahon, this is an amazing collection of songs. For those of you who don’t know, Andrew was diagnosed with Leukemia right after finished the band’s first disc, Everything In Transit. The Glass Passenger features songs directly influenced by this ordeal.

The lyrical content is what really makes this cd stand out. Songs like “The Resolution” speak of standing on your own two feet and not needing the approval of others to be who you are and do what you want to do. Other tracks like the popular “Swim”, feature verses wrapped in hope for the future and the burning desire to never give up.

If you’re having a rough day and need a little pick-me-up, Andrew brings the jams that will get you through the day.

Rating: 5/5
RIYL (Rock If You Like): Something Corporate, The Fray, OneRepublic
D/L: http://www.megaupload.com/?d=DMU5RI1Q


Cartel – Cycles

“I have no worries, I’m in no hurry here”, belts Cartel lead singer Will Pugh in the B-side “I’m in no hurry.” “No worries” pretty much describes the whole album. After being widely panned for their participation in Dr. Pepper’s Band in A Bubble promotion and producing a subpar album, Cartel is back in a big way with Cycles.

The first track “Let’s Go” sets the tone for what’s to come with a huge hook and lively guitars. The album’s lyrical content focuses on the universal themes of love and loss that everyone can identify with. This is a cd that just screams “SUMMER” and it’s best played with the windows down and the speakers turned all the way up.

Rating: 4.5/5
RIYL: New Found Glory, The Starting Line, Summer
D/L: http://www.mediafire.com/?lzzjjngtgzz

Next Week: John Mayer – Battle Studies, fun. – Aim and Ignite

Bienvenidos....

So.... I once again have a blog. This time, however, this won't be used as a travelogue/journal as much as it will be a (mostly) humorous outlet for me. I'll be writing about things I care about such as music, school, future plans, and whatever weird thoughts happen to be on my mind at the time. With that said, welcome to my world and prepare for anything! I'm going to try to do a few weekly features as well, so check back every week for "Free Music Friday" where I pick a few things I've been listening to, review it, and provide a link for your listening pleasure.

p.s. for those of you who know me well, you know that I'm pretty much obsessed with Seinfeld. Thus my header picture of "The Timeless Art of Seduction."